At Last She Understands
by MightyJox
Summary: After "Married with Fishsticks", Gabrielle and Joxer talk things through.


"At Last She Understands" by MightyJox At Last She Understands   
by MightyJox 

[mightyjox51@yahoo.com][1]   


© Copyright Thing: Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, Argo, and even Hagar all belong to MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. Even if you love this story (lol), it's mine, so you can't take it, publish it, or anything like that.   
  
Rating: PG, I guess. Nothing bad. 

The sun cast its warm rays upon the earth, making everything shine brilliantly, and the birds chirped happily in the olive trees they called home. All of nature's signs said that it was a beautiful day, but for one particular warrior wannabe, the day was as tragic as they came. His mind was speeding in circles, trying to make sense of what happened, and his heart seemed broken beyond repair. He didn't know what he did wrong, but it was obviously a biggie, since the one woman that he truly loved didn't even look at him, let alone talk to him.   
  
_By the gods, what did I do?_   
  
Joxer walked with his head low and lagged behind Xena and Gabrielle, trying to think of how he screwed up this time._ I saw Gabby fall into the water, thanks to Discord and Aphrodite, and since Xena was holding Eve and I was the only one around, I jumped in and brought her to the dock. I didn't know what to do, but mouth-to-mouth sounded like a good idea, so I tried it..... and, if it weren't for her dying and everything, it would have been the best mouth-to-mouth ever.... _   
He gave himself a mental slap for thinking about that right now. He had to figure this out, and being distracted by that sort of thing wouldn't help. He got over the mouth-to-mouth, and then remembered when she kissed him....   
  
He closed his eyes for a second and tried to relive the moment, with himself taking a gigantic gulp of air and suddenly having her kissing him without hesitation. At the time, to him it didn't seem that wrong of her to do that, but he now knew that with the way things were going, that was probably the last time she would ever press her lips against his, and that made him sink even further into his despair. Joxer jolted from his reverie with a groan, managing to receive an icy glare from the bard.   
  
Gods, this sucked.   
  
With an even heavier heart, he returned to his previous thoughts, searching for something, anything that he could apologize for to try to make the situation better. _After she asked me what I was doing, I said something after she kissed me. "Well, apparently, just what you've always wanted."_   
  
The phrase he had spoke earlier that day echoed through his head, and he finally realized what he did wrong._ Because of that stupid comment, Gabrielle hates me, and now I have to walk around with my cheek being a gorgeous shade of blue. _   
  
He lifted his hand and touched the bruised cheek Gabby had given him on the dock. It didn't hurt physically now, but it packed an immense emotional whallop that was hard to overcome. But maybe it wasn't what he said. Maybe it was something else......   
_I should be OK, if I just shutup, but I have to talk to her, and soon. I guess I'll apologize today. But... I screwed up BIG a few days ago, and I screwed up big today, so if what they say is true about bad stuff coming in three's, shouldn't whatever I say turn into disaster?_ He thought about if for a minute, and then decided that he has gone WAY over the supposed limit of three catastrophes in the past few weeks, so a good situation is long overdue, right? That last thought was encouraging, and somehow gave him enough hope and determination to not leave Xena and Gabs, like he usually did when something awful happened. No, he was going to do something about this.   
  
He decided that he was just going to talk to Gabby, apologize for what he said, and be completely truthful with her. No gimmicks. No swells in ego. No bursting into song. He was going to do something that he hadn't done in a long time: just try to talk to her. Or listen mostly, as it might turn out. He thought,_ But no matter what, I'm gonna be nice to her, even if she calls me an idiot again or makes some remark that I don't know the meaning of. Whatever happens, it'll turn out, and one thing will never change: I will always love her, to the very end._

_He can be such a dork._ Gabrielle walked silently next to Xena and set her gaze ahead, staring into nothing. _This will be an interesting night around the campfire, with Joxer sulking about what he did or trying to make me smile or something equally stupid. He'll never understand that I won't love him the way he loves me._ She wondered at how idiotic he must have been to jump into the water and save her..... well, that was all right, but he enjoyed the mouth-to-mouth WAY too much. _Even the kiss wouldn't have sent me over the edge, if he had just stood there dazed or passed out. But no, he had to say that dumb line of his. If he had just kept his mouth shut, everything would be more simple and I wouldn't have this strong urge to punch him again. Gods, Joxer, why do you have to be like this?_

Around the campfire, it wasn't nearly as bad as Gabrielle had imagined. For much of the time, Xena messed with Eve, Gabrielle had cooked dinner, and Joxer didn't say a word unless spoken to. Xena noticed that Joxer was fidgety and seemed like he was rolling around a speech, undoubtedly for Gabrielle, so she decided it would be a good time to leave the two alone. Who knew? Maybe they could work something out.   
  
She stood up with Eve in her arms and announced, "I'm going to check on Argo with Eve." She looked at Joxer squarely. "We'll be back in a while." When he realized what she was doing, he smiled his thanks to her. Xena turned to Gabrielle and playfully jibed, "Have fun," before walking into the woods in search of Argo.   
  
Gabrielle glared at her departing friend and then turned on the log she was sitting on to face Joxer and be able to cut off whatever he was going to say. It took him a few moments to get up the courage to start, and he inhaled deeply, continuing to stare at the ground. "Gabby, about today--"   
  
"I don't want to talk about that right now, Joxer," she interrupted, obviously annoyed already.   
  
"Well, I do." He looked at her right in the eye and was kind of hurt by her unwillingness to talk, but not at all shocked. "I've been worrying about this all day, and even though it might not be the easiest thing to talk about for you, we're gonna do it."   
  
Gabrielle was quite surprised at how forceful he was being, and wasn't able to say anything, and she saw him return to his ol' bashful self again.   
  
"Gabrielle, I'm.... I'm really sorry for saying that stupid comment after..... after you kissed me..... It probably didn't make the situation any easier to deal with, and.... if there's anything..... _anything_ I can do to help make up for it.... just, just let me know." He paused for a second and added quietly, "I really am sorry."   
  
As if she wasn't already surprised with his openness, now she was utterly amazed, and Gabrielle chose her words carefully, trying to make this as clear as possible. "I'm not saying that your comment wasn't stupid -- it was -- but I shouldn't have hit you. Maybe a good nose tweak was in order, but not a punch. I should have had a better way of handing my surprise."   
  
"Surprise?" Joxer got his trademark puzzled look, and gave out an intelligent, "Huh?"   
  
She smiled and jokingly said, "Well, I wasn't exactly expecting to kiss you!"   
  
What was supposed to enlighten him only made him more confused. "Then who were you expecting to kiss?"   
  
Uh, oh.   
  
She hadn't even told Xena about her dream yet, and there was no way she would tell Joxer. Not now, anyway. And besides, who knew if it was actually a dream? She still had that ring she was given, but it was securely tucked into the bottomless pit of her pack. After hesitating longer than she liked, Gabrielle shifted uneasily on the log, before coming up with a lame excuse. "It's a long story."   
  
He leaned forward and smiled. "I'd love to hear it." He noticed how his words had some bite to them, so he tried to recover. "But if you don't want to tell me..... that's OK."   
  
"I haven't told anyone yet, except Eve. I want to figure it out myself, before I pass it on."   
  
Joxer lowered his head, wondering what she was holding back. "I understand...... but when you figure it out, tell me." He looked back up at her and smiled weakly, trying not to destroy one of the few moments when they actually had a semi-real conversation.   
  
The bard just stared at him, noticing his gentle composure and regard for this. His large, pleading eyes betrayed his deep love and concern, showing who he really was inside, and it was amazing how much expression was in those eyes of his; they told exactly how he was feeling. Gabrielle finally realized how much he really cared for her, and that this wasn't a crush that would come and go, or a desperate call for attention. She recognized that Joxer loved her with all his heart, no matter how she yelled at him, no matter how she hit him, no matter what happened.   
  
For some reason, her thoughts drifted over to Hagar in her dream, and, as it turned out, Joxer wasn't that different from him. Joxer had made a lot of mistakes, and Hagar had, too, but he made up for them. Hagar acted almost exactly like Joxer had, when she and Xena first traveled with him, with him being a clumsy, arrogant, moronic guy, who pretended to be more than he actually was. But Hagar changed. Why couldn't Joxer?   
  
Xena suddenly walked into the campsite with Eve, and, when she saw that they must have been talking, she scolded herself for not staying out longer. She knew that they needed time alone, and she might have just blown whatever chance they had. Or not..... Gabrielle didn't look annoyed, mad, frustrated, or on the brink of insanity, like she usually did when Joxer was around. If anything, she looked embarrassed that Xena had caught them talking.   
  
Gabrielle turned toward her and murmured, "Hi." She looked at the star-lit sky and continued. "It's getting late, so I think I'll call it a night." She nodded her head slightly, glanced at Xena and Joxer both, and then climbed into her blankets on the ground without a word.   
  
"Goodnight." Joxer sat on the log, not expecting a response, but Gabrielle looked at him and gave him a small smile, before rolling over and succumbing to her need to think things through.   
  
Xena just raised an eyebrow, watching the scene play out, and when it was done, said, "I'm going to bed, too. How 'bout you, Joxer?"   
  
He sighed quietly and seemed far away, eventually remembering that Xena had asked him a question. "Oh, I will in a minute."   
  
Xena lay in her place next to Gabrielle and knew that whatever happened while she was gone was good. Gabrielle actually smiled at Joxer, and he looked.... content. For most people, this might not be something to rejoice over, but this was a vast improvement from what these two were usually like.   
  
This was very, very good. 

**The End**   


Here's the real disclaimer:  
Xena: Warrior Princess, Gabrielle, Argo and all other characters who have appeared in the syndicated series Xena: Warrior Princess, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fan fiction. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices. NOTE: All works remain the © copyright of the original author. These may not be republished without the author's consent. Yada, yada, yada. 

   [1]: mailto: mightyjox51@yahoo.com



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